Love Courageously!

Little sweetheart, quite a few years ago I came across these amazing message bracelets. 

I'm sure you'll remember that back in the early 2000's (it's funny that people have only now begun calling them the "aughts" when you and I both lived through them and no one did!), rubber message bracelets were super common. I think the first ones that gained popularity were the "Beat Cancer" ones that came out around 1999 but others came forward over the years for various causes and in various colors. 

I first found these - "Love Courageously" - through a friend in Austin. It was shortly after your tragic passing and she sent it to me as a gift. It was so on point because that's both what you taught me and also how you loved me.  

One day, the silicone gave out but I couldn't find the organization that had originally made them. So, I had a few made myself. I gave two to your folks and these two are my own. 

Love Courageously. Yes, little sweetheart. Always.

A Different Holiday

Little sweetheart, Happy Michaelmas! 

This is a little holiday I didn't know about until a few years ago - it's the feast day of St Michael (I suspect you've gotten to know him well!). Sometimes I make a cake in celebration now (although my diet wouldn't approve it this year!) and I also text your dad because he's a Mike! 

There are actually two dates that mark Michaelmas, the older tradition (and still Eastern observation) is on November 8th and the newer one falls on September 29th. So, if I miss the first one (I did this year - I was on a flight at the time and forgot!), I make sure to mark this one on my calendar! 

Happy Michaelmas, little sweetheart!! 

Vote!

Little sweetheart, thank god you didn't have to live through this political era, but let me tell you - I know you're watching and helping from above - that we had a transformative election night, last night. I've been in touch with your folks all night and into this morning, itself. It's been very difficult and your mom, in particular, has been deeply disheartened. We're all feeling very encouraged this morning. And I know that you are with us!

A Thousand Words

Little sweetheart, I found this note and put it by one of my favorite pictures of you. It kinda says it all. With love forever, your Michael

All Souls

Little sweetheart, today is All Souls Day. For 15 years I have kept this day a holy one. As I do on this day. Love forever. See you there, soon.

All Saints

Little sweetheart, today is All Saints Day. 

I didn't know much about it not having grown up Catholic (I know more about All Soul's Day, which is tomorrow). 

Famously, there is a wonderful rectory, a small cloister of nuns, just around the corner from our apartment and across from the Sacred Heart church (a mostly Spanish speaking parish) on W51st St. I have become friendly with the nuns there over the years, little sweetheart - they all know about you and pray for you, even know about our music - and one of them once explained to me that Catholics believe that we direct our prayers to the Saints and that they intercede with God. That's why certain saints are known for a certain thing. 

I think that's so lovely and interesting - and we need all the help that we can get! So, I love the idea of sending prayers directly and also through the specific Saints. It's like "okay, cc: Saint Christopher, let's get him on this thread". 

Needless to say, all my prayers are headed your way, little sweetheart. Check your inbox in Heaven! You may get multiple copies!

Halloween movies, pt 3

Little sweetheart, this was our absolutely favorite of the season. 

Even today, few people know about it. It's an incredibly unique and intriguing 2008 movie - billed as a "romantic horror film" - directed by Tomas Alfredson and adapted by John Ajvide Lindqvist from his own novel. 

The film is set in Sweden, a suburb outside of Stockholm, in the 1970's. The main characters are a boy and girl, both 12. I don't want to spoil the plot for anyone but despite being a "vampire movie" I think - and I think we both do, little sweetheart - that it is a love story. 

The two kids find and save one another, in many, quite literally, existentially. 

So, of course, it resonates with me forever, because I remember our earliest moments and how very much I believe that you changed and saved my life. I know that you did. And I am forever grateful.

With all my love...