In The Very Air

There are, as ever, so very many things I want to tell you, little sweetheart. There doesn't seem to be enough time in the days and, to be honest, I don't always make the best use of the time I do have.  Please help me stay close and listen for your guidance, won't you, my little sweetheart? I long for your presence and example.

So, there is much to do. We're working on the live Of Love and Loss - Kim sending her readings of the narration I wrote, me writing guitar to go under it, Jason and I practicing and recording, me again mixing and beginning to map out the visuals. So a lot to do there. And the memoir! Much much work to be done.

But just now I want to pause to say that spring has finally arrived in NYC these last few days and it seems to heighten both my sense of your presence and my terribly keen longing for you. I've come, as I think I've told you, to listen to birdsong, stopping whatever I might be doing, quieting myself and bending my ear and spirit toward your own. I know you do everything you can to signal your eternal presence to me through these mortal barriers that hold me hostage. I must heed your every whisper, every signal. Please help me to remember and do exactly that, my love.

And as it's spring, very decidedly today, I've all the windows open. And somehow, miraculously, I can intuit, can feel you in the warm breeze, in the very air. It's so familiar it makes me cry.

How achingly I miss you. How desperately I need to strengthen my faith, heed your call, know that you are near, nearer than I can imagine, and live out whatever may be left of my mortal days, honoring you as best I can, and finally to join you.

Please let it be soon, my love. Please help me. Please forgive me. Please please be with me. Help me be the man you so selflessly were moulding me to be. Yours.

With all my love forever to The Forever.