Sunday, July 30, 2017

Bad Day

Little sweetheart, I had a bad day. It was yesterday. It was Saturday. There was no good reason to. I haven't wanted to say here, because I don't want to jinx it, but I've been writing a lot all week and last week too. I feel like something big for you is coming. And work on Sometimes in Dreams. I'd been digging in and finally feeling like I was doing things right for a change but yesterday I got off track and I just felt terrible.

Sometimes, well, often, actually, weekends are the loneliest for me. I know that. I can feel them coming. I try to set myself little things - chores and work and ritual to help get me through. But sometimes I just fall into either despair or bad habits. I need to remember and listen for you. I know you will help me if I only listen.

Thank you for not giving up on me, my darling. Thank you for finding me in dreams and for sending me little signals in the daylight hours that turn my head and stop me in my tracks. May I simply quiet myself and let you guide me. May I do your work as our own. And please, my angel, please take me to you the moment heaven will allow. It's terribly hard here without you but I promise to try harder to do my very best. With all my love forever.

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