Early Voting

Little sweetheart, we're all terribly anxious about coming election. I won't go too long long about it here but your mom and dad are both very concerned and we're all just, honestly, stressing out. 

New York State started doing early voting a few years ago. I'd never done it before, I've just always gone to my regular polling place at the High School of Visual Arts up the street on Election Day itself. But I got something in the mail about early voting for my precinct being at Madison Square Garden. It was a bit daunting. I've not only not been in much of a crowd since the pandemic, I had barely been below W48th Street! But I walked down there yesterday afternoon. 

Early voting is from 10am-4pm. I got there about 2:30pm and the line was out on the street all the way back from the entrance at 7th Avenue to the back of Penn Station at the corner of W33rd and 8th. About 20 minutes in, a guy with a "I Voted" sticker came walking past us and said that this was the point where he had been in the line when he first arrived and that it was about one hour from here to check in and voting. As we got progressively closer, everyone was in good spirits and some poll workers even came around with free coffee for anyone that wanted a cup. 

Later, as we turned the corner onto 7th Avenue and could actually see the entrance, another came by with Kit-Kat bars for Halloween! From that point you could see that there was another line going around the block from the northside, from W34th, to meet this one here. It was an enormous amount of people, little sweetheart, but again, everyone was in great and friendly spirits. 

Once inside, it really didn't take long at all. And when I finished scanning my ballot, one of the workers raised her arms and said "Yay, you did it!". They gave me a "I Voted Early" sticker and I put it on my tee shirt walking home feeling somehow much calmer about everything. 

I just love this city, as I know you do, little sweetheart. And I feel like you are very close to me today. I told your mom and dad all about it and they were very happy too. 

Love you forever.

Coming Soon...

Little sweetheart, we've been getting some wonderful airplay and advance reviews for the new album, Deux Anges, ahead of its release on your birthday next month. 

KFJC did a three hour special about the band last month, previewing ten of the 30 tracks in the third hour and radio from near and far - WFMU, The Netherland's DeMist, Germany's TSFC, and others have been featuring and debuting others. 

Some very kind words have found print also, little sweetheart, from The Wire Magazine's Dave Mandl and France's Punktum, who wrote, in part:

“The announcement of a new Bipolar Explorer album is always, to us, a surprise as formidable as it is pleasant. Indeed, this project, which we’ve been loving for several years now, has never tried to do the same work twice, slow rock movements on which Summer, Sylvia and Michael lay their spontaneous inspirations. Drawing ideas from the realm of dreams, as well as the deeper, more refined confrontation with reality, through a softness full of wisdom and contemplation, Bipolar Explorer is a call for renaissance, a refusal of passivity, without any futile anger. An introduction to the inner and spiritual dream, the first excerpt, ”Santa Barbara”, with its hypersensitive contours, goes beyond our hopes and dreams, while found sounds from an indescribable place and the musicians’, pure and unique, meet. DEUX ANGES is released on November 13th.” 

All of it, as ever, for you. With all my love forever. 

Serafinlove

My little sweetheart, some time not long after your tragic passing, I asked your father if I could take your name - hyphenating my own to Serafin-Wells. Very gracious and kindly he told me that he would be "proud" if I did so. From that day until now it has been so. 

Tonight, I watched the new, special episode of The West Wing, that HBO is doing prior to the election. I often watch episodes of the original series thinking of you, who first lent me the Serafin DVD collection. Your mom told me how proud you were to have introduced me to the show and I often weep watching. 

Tonight brought it home again - how proud I am to have taken your name, to have been loved by you, to send my every prayer to you knowing we will soon be conjoined and forever. 

 With all my love forever.

Summer Shrine

Little sweetheart, en route to Cork City we stopped at a very special place - Gougane Barra. 

Saint Finbar built an ancient monastery on the island that sits there within a lake which is also the source of the River Lee. There's a whole series of wonderful little meditation caves, an ancient graveyard, the church, and a sprawling National Park filled with wildlife, notably birds, here. 

Kris has mentioned a stop and I knew about it but hadn't explained it well enough to you. Honestly, you thought he was talking about a bank! I don't know why! Maybe "Barra" sounded like "Bankers"? 

Anyway, once we arrived you didn't want to leave and I was kicking myself for not having given us at least an entire day and night there. There's also an absolutely beautiful lodge there, a hotel. And you and I made plans to return and spend the night. We went in and got some info from the very nice people who ran the place (the hotel). 

You could tell why they had such a lovely lodge there because the chapel on the island was like a storybook one. One that you could imagine people so very much wanting to have for their wedding. 

We went inside and lit candles, you and I, having the place to ourselves. And I took this picture of you. It's quite dim inside - gorgeous and cozy and sweet - but I should have paused to get better light. We kind of took this photo on the down low, trying not to make too much fuss. 

Later, I had our friend Audun do a painting of you based on it. I very much wanted to use this picture for the cover of Electric Hymnal but the original was a little too low res and the painting, although I love it, doesn't fully capture you. 

But, you my darling girl, captured me from the first. And I remain yours forever. 

With all my love.

 

 

 

 

Ireland Day Seven

Little sweetheart, on our last day we began the drive back to Cork City. Along the way, we found a country fair going on. 

There were farmers and locals and kids running around. A hundred tractors all lined up in display. A dog race going on, with an announcer detailing the results over a PA. Games and food and sweets and just the whole countryside there come to a stop for the afternoon, the air full of festivity. 

I came right up to you, in this moment, as I often would when you had that enormous black sunhat on. Usually I'd duck up under its brim to give you a kiss. But this time I just took this treasured picture of your sweet, beautiful, shining face. 

God, how I love you! Forever, my gorgeous girl. Forever.

Bracelet

Little sweetheart, several years ago your mom got each of us a lovely little memorial bracelet - leather wrist strip holding a polished steel setting with your name and dates on one side and a personalized phrase on the other (mine, of course, saying "Little Sweetheart"). 

Some time back, because I wore it every single day everywhere I went, the leather began to give way on one side from the clasp and I had to put it aside for fear that it would fall off and I might lose it. 

But this afternoon, I took it to that tiny little shop at W55th and 9th, the shoe repair shop run by that guy who always says that he - and true to his word usually can - can fix anything. He stopped what he was doing when I came in and took a look at it under his magnifying glass light. I asked if he could fix it and he said he'd do it right then and there, just to have a seat. He cut a new piece of leather and attached it so seemingly seamlessly that you couldn't even tell that a new piece had been attached to the old. He cut away the frayed edge and then asked me to try it on to make sure the fit was good. Then he went over to his industrial sewing machine and stitched it up properly. 

It's totally restored now! It feels so good to be back in the habit of putting both it and my red "Love Courageously" band on each day. I took a picture and sent it to your mom. 

Feeling very close to you just now! With all my love forever. Forever!

The Snug

Little sweetheart, at the end of this long day we'd saved up a nice treat - we drove over to the largest village over on the Bay - Bantry, historic from the uprising, and a charming little hamlet now near the water. 

Kris and I always like to go here once or twice if we were staying long in Kilcrohane to eat at a little pub called The Snug. It was a just a little place but it was absolutely lovely - a long beautiful bar and half a dozen or so little tables all looking like great polished trees stumps and cozy plush cushioned banquettes. 

Neither of us had steak often but this was cattle country and it was frankly amazing. Kris and I each had steak and you two burgers - they just came that way on the menu, two not one! You saved one for later. 

Usually, like in high season, you couldn't even get into The Snug. It was always packed out the door. Kris and I had only ever eaten at the bar - which was nice, too - but we had the entire place to ourselves that night. 

We had a long leisurely dinner with drinks and dessert and the staff was really nice. You said it was the best dinner ever! And I have this picture to attest. 

When we finally ventured back out into the night two dozen swans had settled into the bay, just outside of The Snug, under the footbridge. We stood there and marveled at them. And I held you in my arms on this magic, magic night. 

With all my love forever.

 

 

Back Light

Little sweetheart, after we found our way back - like I said, I nearly got us lost on our return! - we watched the beautiful sunset from the little landing point and visitors center at the beginning of the trail. 

There were a couple of nice little picnic tables there - wich would have been perfect if we'd thought to pack a lunch. We were famished! We'd get in the car after, meeting up with Kris, and drive into Bantry for dinner. 

But first we paused here and I took this glorious picture of you against the setting sun. 

I've a big poster size one of it framed and hanging here in the red table room. I see it every day. As I listen for you every day. And remember. 

With all my love forever.

The Light of My Life

Little sweetheart, from that very same spot, I crossed over the railing myself and you took me in your arms, as you had into your life, saving and mending me. 

How I long now to make the even larger crossing from this place to the one where you are and be within your arms again. 

And with faith and doing my best, the way you taught me, with love and faith and kindness, listening closely for your celestial encouragement, I know, I know I will. 

With all my love forever.

Ireland Day Six

Little sweetheart, we managed to pack so much into day six of our wonderful trip to Ireland and began the day by heading out on our biggest adventure - the long coastal route climb to the lighthouse at the very edge of Sheep's Head peninsula. 

It was several hours to and back in all - we nearly ran out of daylight on our return! There was no one around as we got to the most remote parts. Indeed, I feared I had gotten us lost on the way back, only to turn around and see a sign nearly hidden from the path directing us to the main road. But that was all later... 

The trek out took an hour or two until we could finally see the little lighthouse at the end. All around it was railing and a big sign saying "Danger! Do Not Cross!". Naturally, it was the first thing you did, having spotted a sweet little stone stairway on the other side. 

You sat down there, looking at the vast expanse of the Atlantic beyond and the brilliantine autumn Irish sky stretching out before you and turned back to gaze at me as I snapped this picture of you. It became the back cover of our album Of Love and Loss and is the front cover image of the book I'm writing for you. 

My gorgeous, gorgeous girl. Love you forever.

Back at The Bay

Little sweetheart, we had plans to head out on the longest of our treks, to the lighthouse at the edge of the Sheep's Head, but once we discovered it, a quick jaunt over to the water - Bantry Bay - on the other side of the island, appealed nearly as much. 

At night, you could see the sweep of the biggest lighthouse around - the one at Fastnet Island - light the sky and the low distant bleating of its foghorn. 

By day, the beautiful blue waters were visible as we hiked across lush meadows of tall green almost sponge-like grass. We found blowholes and sheep and kept an eye out for our old Jack Russell terrier pal. 

We took this picture together down by the dock before heading back to the village for a nice lunch. 

Love you forever.  

 

 

At The Edge of The World - Together!

Little sweetheart, on one of our day trips we actually got back in the car, instead of venturing out on foot. 

Kilcrohane is at the edge of the middle of three peninsulas - The Beara, The Mizenhead and The Sheep's Head. The Sheep's Head was our peninsula but on one of little roadtrips, we headed up to the northernmost of them, The Beara. 

At the edge of the Beara itself is a little island called Dursey. A fww other small islands - The Skelligs - also dot the coast, there. Here at the edge of The Beara is a little cable car that runs out to Dursey Island and from that very spot, Europe ends. It's the most western point, next stop, New York! 

Kris took this picture of you and I together there at a whimsical little signpost marking the distance to New York (with the icon of a swimmer), to Trailhead and to the mythical Land of Youth or Tir n nOg - the title of the play that was the ocassion of our meeting one another. 

What a wonderful day it was! Love you forever. 

Ireland Day 5

Little sweetheart, one day on our travels we found an ancient stone circle. It was actually a kind of double one, almost a circle within the circle itself. 

It seemed to us both a holy and magical place and we stood there together, arms around one another breathing in the solemn moment, conjoined. 

You captured this a moment later, kissing me and telling me that you loved me. 

Just looking at it now reminds me how very blessed I am. My angel. My love.

Doneen Pier

Little sweetheart, here's one more from our walk down to the end of Doneen Pier with our little canine tour guide! 

You found these sweet little steps down to the water at one side where, presumably, a small boat might dock. You climbed down and then let me take your picture posed to climb back up like a beautiful red-headed mermaid emerging from the blue waters. 

My gorgeous girl! Love you forever!

Ireland Day Four

Little sweetheart, we'd take an epic walk soon all the way out to the lighthouse and the end of the peninsula, but there's was also a really lovely spot heading in the other direction out of the village to the pier in Doneen. 

You and I set off and at some point a little Jack Russell terrier joined us. He keep running just a bit ahead of you and I, almost as if he knew we wanted to go and was leading us there. He kept us company for almost two hours before eventually dashing off as mysteriously as he had appeared. 

This picture of the two of us is just at the beginning of the long path down to the water. 

Love you forever.

Ireland Day Three

Little sweetheart, one of our dearest friends in the village over the years was Johnnie. We'd rented his guesthouse one Christmas and we always liked hanging out with him at Eileen's pub. I was so keen for you to meet him! 

We stopped by his house in the afternoon for a visit and then all five of us walked down to Eileen's together and settled into the corner table by the big bay window. 

Here's a shot I took of you looking so happy and beautiful, in one of the sweaters you'd brought along and your high black walking boots propped up on a stool.  

Love you forever.

Ireland Day Two

Little sweetheart, one of our favorite things to do wherever we were was to go on epically long walks. 

We'd traverse the whole of Golden Gate Park together on an afternoon or walk all the way downtown and across the Brooklyn Bridge together to see a film at BAM. 

Ireland was so perfect for this kind of thing. And one of the first things we did everyday was head out for an adventure. 

Everything was so lush and gorgeous. Even just setting out from behind the holiday house, the setting was breathtaking - as were you, always, and here in that pretty fur hat you brought along especially for our long-dream-of trip, here. 

Later, this photo became the inset picture for our album Til Morning Is Nigh. With all my love forever.

Ireland Day One

Little sweetheart, over the next week or so I'd like to post a few pictures of our wonderful trip together to Ireland. 

We'd been staying In London with Kris & Joy, and we got up early one morning, drove to Stansted and flew to Cork City. We picked up a rental car there and drove up the beautiful coast to our destination - Kilcrohane in West County Cork. 

After getting the keys to the holiday house there, left for us at the pub, we took a nap together - we'd been up since about 4am! - then got up in the afternoon and went for a walk down to Bantry Bay. Joy took this picture of us. It's one of my favorites. 

Love you forever. 

Thoughts tonight

 So many thoughts of you tonight, my little sweetheart. And I'll try to get to them all soon. But just happened across this video, tonight, one of our best, I think. With all my love forever.